(Outtake from last year. Bean was newly crawling and had no patience for her stupid parents. Every shot was like resetting a typewriter. I’m blinking, naturally. And poor Dave is just doing his part, and wondering how to quietly extract himself.)
There’s nothing like a family holiday photo shoot to send you running to the nearest leftover pumpkin pie and warm bath, preferably both at the same time. What eighth circle of hell is this tradition, and then WE KEEP DOING IT EVERY YEAR. Which is the sign of madness, right? The actual definition?
We took ours over the course of two days. Obviously. (You need at least one day to get all the scorn, regret, and tears out of the way; the second day is when you remember that you all like each other and actually get a photo you can use.)
Ok, so, lessons learned:
1. Get in the photo, mama.
Seriously people, don’t just make your kids do all the heavy lifting. It’s so much more fun when the parents are in the frame, even if we can’t see your entire face. Plus, I’m sure your old law school friends want to see you too, not just the toddler and preschooler.
2. If you’re playing photographer, and therefore using a tripod and timer, make sure your camera can take up to 10 or so pictures at once.
My new Canon does not do this; it will only take one. There’s nothing worse than running back and forth, waiting 10 seconds for a photo to snap, and then only getting one measly photo out of the ordeal. And there is practically no way your child is doing something cute or acceptable in that one photo. So, I ended up running sprints between the camera and family, over a hundred times. Yeah. Recipe for a totally awesome photo that you will want to put up on the mantle.
This year, I used my old Canon. Job done. With ten photos at once, you’re also more likely to get a photo where someone isn’t blinking.
3. Photography 101: the sun should be behind the camera
Yes, yes, there are photographers that can shoot awesome photos into the sun. You are likely not one of them, and certainly not when you’re relying on a tripod and timer. Sun then camera then family.
Of course, it’s best to shoot when the sun is low in the sky, either morning or late afternoon in the winter. Use shadows to help guide you. (Basically, the tripod’s shadow is like an arrow — the shadow should be pointing at your family.)
Plus, think about positioning when you’re picking a locale. If you want the city skyline in the background, and you want to go to a park that’s west of downtown…. then pick a photo shoot time in the late afternoon when the sun will be in the west, pointing eastward.
4. Accept that kids won’t sit still, so take photos in action
Children pulsate with kinetic energy. This is not something you can strong arm into an angelic, soft-focus close-up photo.
The first day, Dave and I were trying to grab, stuff, and restrict Bean into sitting still child OH MY GOD WHY DO YOU MOVE SO MUCH. Every photo was both of us clutching arms, torsos, jackets. The poor thing looked miserable and straight-jacketed. And I still barely got any photos of her face.
Day two, our rule was no handling. We held her hands and let her pirouette, leap, launch herself at us, and take up sword fighting. Kids are adorable. Let them be adorable.
5. You should be moving too
Sure, you don’t want to stray too far from the focal point, but don’t lock yourself down. If you’re face on or in total profile, you might look stiff compared to your fun,rowdy kids.
Loosen up, walk in small circles, swing a kid around, play. Chances are, you’ll actually be smiling out of joy and love, and I’ll be darned, you’ll look way prettier in photos with that big, proud mama smile.
6. Adults, you’re job is to know where the camera is and that there’s a photo shoot going on
The kids are just having fun times in the park with mom and dad. You need to be on the ball. If you feel like your face is in the shade, pivot out of the shade. If you see your kids’ faces are in the shade in their frolicking, pull them out of the shade. Keep it loose, yes, but your job is to remember that there’s a photo shoot happening.
Oh, and smiles, at all times. HA HA HA HA I’VE NEVER HAD SO MUCH FUN WATCHING YOU SWING A STICK AT ME. Etc. It is so bittersweet to finally get ONE awesome photo of your kid’s face lit with glee…and look over to see that you look like a contestant for the World’s Ugliest Dog, only squintier.
AND, don’t fix stray child-hairs or pull down shirts or adjust your kid in anyway once the camera starts clicking. The rest of the photo may be gorgeous, but everyone’s eyes will be drawn to the problem you were trying to solve.
7. For holiday cards, open/uniform backgrounds look better than busy background
The first day, we ended up in a palm tree grove. Totally beautiful and oh so we-live-in-California-suckers. But, it was a busy background that didn’t translate well to overlapped merry wishes.
The second day, we climbed up a grassy hillside. Much less dramatic, but the simplicity looks great on a card.
8. Don’t start on a sour note aka don’t force your kid to wear something she doesn’t want to
I know, the matching sweaters was supposed to be the entire thing! Starting on a sour note isn’t good though. Tempers aren’t going to get better once the camera and forced smiles come out, you know?
Bean was about two beats away from a full-on shrieking session when I suggested maybe she change out of her (beloved, a couple sizes too small) dress. We stared at each other, at our impasse. I convinced her to wear an extremely similar other dress (you know, one that actually covered her bum). It wasn’t the outfit I originally imagined, but she looked cute. And, I think the dress may have photographed better than my original idea anyway.
Keep it loose, give up on your vision if it becomes a point of contention.
9. Take hundreds of photos
I once read an article by a professional wildlife photographer. Guess how many photos he took in order to get a 21-photo slideshow.
Go on, guess.
5,300.
Sure, you just need one, but yeah, take waaaay more photos than you think you need to. A good photo is a stroke of luck and magic.
10. If you’ve done all this and still none of the photos look good, ask your husband or friend to take a look through all of them too.
I didn’t like any of the photos I took last year. I stared at them for days, no luck. I tried working on some of them to see if I could force a good photo out of a merely ok photo. No luck.
And then Dave sauntered by and quickly chose a photo I hadn’t even been considering.
We got barraged by friends and family telling us what a lovely photo it was. One friend framed it. Another actually started crying when she saw it. And this was a photo I had completely missed.
Don’t underestimate a pair of fresh eyes.
11. And if all else fails, do a holiday card of outtakes
Trust me, every family will understand and find it hilarious.
