Until we got a car (more on that some other day), I hadn’t realized that much of urban parenting means going without an automotive safety net. No trunk to store extra supplies, no car to flee to when a tantrum kicks into high gear and you want to get away from prying eyes, no possibility of getting home any times soon. You only have yourself and whatever you’re carrying.
So, when something complicated happened — blow out diaper, howling baby, tantruming toddler, sudden horrible body rash, pee-soaked toddler — I had to seek out public spaces where I could stop, get us calmed down, and MacGyver a solution with whatever was in my backpack. Or get us close enough to a solution that we could handle a 45 minute bus ride home.
And now I have this mental map of safe zones in San Francisco — public places offering quiet and some privacy, preferably clean and in the shade. In the coming weeks, I’ll work on highlighting different neighborhoods and my specific safe zones within each of them. For now, here’s a general rundown:
1. San Francisco Public Libraries
Nearly every neighborhood has its own library branch, and they nearly all have a children’s library area. If you’re not in your own neighborhood, it’s good practice to know where the local library is, as a potential safe zone.
I know it probably seems odd that you’d carry your screaming baby into a library, but I’ve found the children’s libraries to be fairly loud and full of crying babies. I don’t think you’ll stick out. The bathrooms are usually clean, too.
I’ve written before about the children’s library at the Main Public Library in Civic Center before. This should be your first stop if you find yourself anywhere near Civic Center with a crying baby. The children’s library is massive, carpeted, and has excellent clean bathrooms (just for kids).
2. Nordstrom
If you’re anywhere near Union Square, head straight to the Westfield Mall and then to the Nordstrom Women’s Lounge (sorry dads, I’ve heard they don’t really have a men’s lounge). Plush sofas and chairs, with a leather plush changing table area and very clean bathrooms. It’s probably better outfitted than your apartment.
3. SF Rec Centers
Most rec centers are open during the day and offer mostly clean restrooms. Most of the centers also have a quiet lobby area with benches, if you just want some shade. And, outside, you can usually find large playing fields — sitting myself down in the middle of an empty soccer field with a crying Bean sometimes felt just as private as anywhere else.
4. Seek out mini parks & playgrounds
Large playgrounds tend to be crowded, and many of them don’t offer much shade. Search for mini parks in your neighborhood — they feel like a community living room and are usually empty. If you’re in a different neighborhood and have a smartphone, look for any nearby green space on Google Maps. These parks are usually fairly well hidden, so it can be difficult to find them just by walking around.
5. Starbucks
Sure, any coffee shop will do, but you never really know what their bathrooms will look like. Starbucks tend to have large, single person bathrooms (no changing table usually, but you’re probably already used to that.)
6.The entirety of Golden Gate Park, Ocean Beach, and the Presidio
Obviously.
