Back when Bean was still a baby, a friend told a group of us that she’d had a conversation with her toddler about what to do if she got lost.

“Find a mommy and tell her you’re lost.”

At first, the group of us were taken aback that she’d only want her kid to talk to a fellow mother. But, then we listened to her reasoning:

Kids tend to be shy around adults. If she got lost, she would see crowds of adults and wouldn’t know who to go to for help. Telling her to find another mommy is something that she can easily do, even though she’s just a toddler. Toddlers zero in on other children and their mothers in crowded places, and she’ll likely feel less shy around another mother. In other words, “mommies” are people a toddler can easily identify and associate with security. Bingo, exactly what she’ll need if she’s lost.

Isn’t that such a great idea?

(This friend is an educator and used to work at a daycare. She’s good.)

It has the side bonus of working for kids of all ages, too. A month or so ago, Bean and I were having a typical mother-toddler standoff (“Is This Street Busy Enough That I Need to Hold Mommy’s Hand?” “Running Into Oncoming Traffic, is it for You?” “Is Crawling an Acceptable Form of Transportation? Even Across an Intersection?” etc) when a middle-schooler came up to me and started asking questions. I had no idea what he was asking me. Bean was still threatening to run into the street. We were surrounded by lots of other people not currently haggling with a toddler. I was overwhelmed and exasperated, surely any other adult in a 3 block radius was better equipped to help him?

I was about to tell him “I’m sorry, I don’t know where that is,” when my friend’s words reverberated through my head. He’s still a boy; he is lost. I’m the mommy. So, I pulled myself together and helped him out.

Have you had this conversation with your kids? What did you tell them?